It’s time for a bit of transparency as I embrace a new season. My family’s relocation 3 months ago represented far more than a physical move. It symbolized closure: counting successes and cutting losses.
I have been married for over 22 years to Barry, a dedicated, hard working, tenacious, handsome man! We have gathered magnificent memories together; our greatest treasures being our 3 children. There have been tremendous victories and volumes of testimony as to God’s goodness and faithfulness. However, LIFE HAS NOT COME THE WAY WE ORDERED IT!
The cottage-and-white-picket-fence life with “Mr. Bluebird on my shoulder,” has eluded me somehow. I work with the palette I have been given and I am a master at squeezing the “H-E-DOUBLE TOOTHPICK” out of lemons to make lemonade.
In 1994 we moved from Long Beach to Lakewood with a beautiful daughter, and a great deal of humility— having endured 7 years of layoffs due to corporate downsizing. I was ripe with child when we signed our new lease agreement and one week later, we gave birth to a curious and lively son. It was a fruitful introduction to a new chapter. Life was on the mend. Opportunities began to present themselves and I noticed that I was no longer storing breath for anxious sighs.
When the millennium rolled around, we had another son who was not on our To-Do List! I was 42 and my husband was 47. It took some adjustment since, in my head, I was so done having children. However, this playful pup made me understand how completely our steps are ordered by the Lord.
We had resided at the Lakewood address for almost 12 and ½ years when my husband lost his business in March 2007. The following day, our Landlord (knowing nothing about the business) placed our home up for sale. Our lives went into a tailspin. I was reminded of baby eaglets staring in horror as the mother Eagle tears the nest apart to begin flight training! We had 60 days to find a new home and a new source of income.
Housing in Southern California is off the scales! Our plans to purchase were postponed years ago when we endured the layoffs. Repossessions are extremely high right now, so the supply and demand for rentals is much like trying to get to a sale before everyone else. But, we saw God’s faithfulness, and at the 11th hour we were approved for a far better home than we’ve ever had.
At this point in the story, I could insert the happily-ever-after part with a fancy calligraphy "The End," but we're not quite to that chapter. Our move was much like leaving Egypt for the Promise Land. It was time for change: time for weights to be lifted. And although there are giants, we are settling in and beginning to experience the land of "milk and honey" (my husband is a milkman, after all.) Barry has returned to what he loves— the dairy delivery business— and I am standing on a threshold…
THE PURSUIT OF EXPRESSION
I am a creative soul. I have always had a tremendous need to express myself whether I have an audience or not. I am happiest when I am creating something: art, song, poetry, articles, photos, concepts…
In grade school, I buried a metal Band-aid box under a tree in the schoolyard. Within it I stored my "crude" carving tool: a bobby pin with the plastic tips removed. At recess, I would sit under the tree and carve funny faces into bark peelings. Then there was another Band-aid box hidden in my school desk, only this one contained all of my gum wrappers for chains. (I still mourn the fact that they don't make gum wrappers pretty anymore!)
The other day, I found the only surviving journal from my youth. I have tried to toss this journal many times because it mostly contains entries dealing with the crushes I had on boys! I was 16 and the journal documented how easily I could glide from wisdom to whatever! But, there are some redeeming gems…
I reread the journal for a good laugh, and I found something I had forgotten: an entry about photography. In 1974 I wrote, “I love photography. It speaks without words. Someday, I hope to master it.” I had also written down this quote from Edwin Land, the inventor of the Polaroid camera:
“At its best, photography can be an extra sense, or a reservoir for the senses. Even when you don’t press the trigger, the exercise of focusing through a camera can make you better remember thereafter a person or a moment. Photography can teach people to look, to feel, to remember in a way that they didn’t know they could.”
Days before finding this journal, I caught myself wondering where my interest in photography had gone. In my early 20’s, I poured a great deal of money into camera equipment for a boyfriend dabbling with the hobby. This pursuit gave us some incredible Kodak moments; however, our relationship was not to be and off he went— with the camera…
So, here I am blogging… The word “blog” really isn’t that attractive, and up until recently I thought it was a cerebral parking space for politics and sports. Now, I stand before a canvas ready to splash color all over it! It’s strange, but as I work within the blog template and research digital enhancement, I find myself reflecting back to where dreams were placed on pause…
With my first month of blogging behind me, I have embarked on an unexpected journey. Simply looking through the view finder, I’m already capturing creative and self-revealing moments. I’m blowing the dust off of things that have been waiting for a tomorrow that never comes. And, I am making new friends.
The first matter of action is to rescue my repaired PowerBook G4 from the Apple Store. Then I will need to see if my hard drive has been erased (dread the thought) or if I’m ready to roll! Once my Mac and I are partnering again; I plan to launch into new digital dimensions. My Nikon COOLPIX S1 is ready and I actually plan to read the instruction book! Amazing, isn’t it? As an inspiration, my beautiful copy of “Artful Blogging” is sitting beside me. I'm also going to begin assembling the pieces of a book I have been birthing, and I'm hunting for the perfect table to set up my crafts workshop for eventual online sale.
Note: To all of the gifted souls who are featured in “Artful Blogging”, you should be so proud and pleased! Many of the featured blogs are ones that I have already made visits to! Many kudos! What a wonderful introduction to this creative venue!