Imagine leaving the tea table and, once out of earshot, your tea things engage in quibbling rivalry. Maybe it would sound like this...
"Excuse me if I sit on you," the cup said to the saucer.
"I fear I’ve been here all the afternoon."
"Spare excuses," said the saucer; "you have sat on me before, sir."
"Oh, I’ll stir him up directly," said the spoon.
"Stop your clatter! Stop your clatter!" cried the bread-and-butter platter
"Tittle-tattle!" sneered the tea-pot, with a shrug;
"Now, the most important question is my chronic indigestion."
"Ah, you’ve taken too much tannin," jeered the jug.
"Hey, hey, hey!" sang the silver-plated tray,
"It’s time you had your faces washed. I’ve come to clear away!"
~C. J. (Clarence Michael James Stanislaus) Dennis